Submitted Date 10/21/2018

Having surgery as a busy mother is almost impossible. When you have no choice you count on your family and pray for strength. The guilt game one plays on themselves as a mother begins way before the pain of the surgery. The pain of the actual surgery is nothing compared to what we cause ourselves. The feelings of inadequacy and uselessness are unbearable. While I sit here trying to recover, this is the game I play in my head. I can't change what had to be done. But as a mother I feel completely at fault for what I currently cannot do. As I watch my children step up to do my job, the pain sears my heart. Everyone seems upset and stressed, mad even. Is this what they feel or just my guilt overreacting. 

I hope that all of you have a support system in times like these. I know it is hard and unbearable to watch your whole life from a bed. But I want you all to know, it is okay to be weak. It is okay to ask for help. They need you to get better to be the mother they need. Give yourself time to heal so you won't have more complications. 

Most of all remember they love you and IT IS OKAY.

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  • Tanya Marion 4 years, 11 months ago

    I had surgery when my daughter was only two months old. It was awful not being able to lift my own baby. I had to stack pillows in my lap just so I could feed her. I'm sure you have a support system and a family who loves you, but also know that you have us. You have your readers, and we are listening and sending healing vibes your way. Thanks for sharing such a personal message, one that all mothers will surely empathize with.